Friday, December 28, 2012

Making My Own Success

I haven't made a new post in a very long time, and for good reasons. By now it's very apparent my dream has been to play softball at the University of Michigan. While I'm not giving up on that dream, I have decided to go down a different path that will give me the greatest chance of succeeding. With that being said I have decided to move to Kansas, and will go to a community college there. They have a great softball program, and many have gone off to D1 colleges. I'm going to do whatever it takes to make the team.

This move isn't just about softball. I've been out of school for so long I know it'll be a bit of a struggle at first to get back in the swing of things. I'm going to take a couple classes this summer to get back in the grove of school again, then come fall go full-time. I'm going to work my tail off not just to make the softball team, but most importantly in the class room. I WILL earn a scholarship to a top college.

People continue to give me a hard time saying I have no chance, I'm not smart enough, I'm too old (23) etc. I know differently, after having a sport I love be taken away from me, I now have a whole new respect, and cherish the game. I took it all for grated before, and I never will again. I'm now a much more mature player, and understand the game on a level besides the athletic part of it.

This is the only way I can afford to make my dream come true, and it's time I have to do what's best for me. Whether I end up at UofM, or any other University, in the end all that matters to me is that I overcame the odds of my childhood, made something of myself, and can inspire at least one other kid who grew up like I did that they can break the cycle too.

Most people are scared of the future, but not me. I am so anxious to put in all the work, the blood, sweat, and tears over these next 9 months, cause once I make the team it will have all been worth it. But I know it wont end there, these next 4 years I know I will have to push myself to limits I never have before. Most people would dread it, but I'm absolutely looking forward to it. I will succeed, I will reach my dreams.

God Bless

"Happiness will come to you when it comes from you. Success will be yours when you choose to take responsibility for making it so."

Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Light at the end of the tunnel

Since starting this blog I have been working out, and working on building strength back in my shoulder. This past weekend I was at my brothers softball tournament, when the tournament was over I decided to play catch, and take some BP just to test how far along I've come.

Playing catch: My short range is nearly back to 100%, I experienced NO pain, and my accuracy has finally come back. Long range: I was able to throw it farther than I've EVER been able to since injuring my shoulder, accuracy was off a lot, but that's to be expected.  I know I still have a ways to go, but just in this short amount of time I have seen huge progress.

Batting Practice: This is the first time I've took BP since my shoulder injury 7 years ago. When I started you could tell I was really rusty, as time went on I was feeling more comfortable, and by the end I was hitting like I never skipped a beat.

These may seem like small things, but this has removed any, and all doubts I have had about making a comeback in my softball career. I know it's going to take time, I will not only get back to the player I once was, but I will be an even better player than before.

God Bless

"Your talent is God's gift to you. What you do with it is your gift back to God." - Leo Buscaglia

Tuesday, July 3, 2012

Plan B, and following a new path

 Everyone knows my dream/goal is to get accepted into the University of Michigan, and to make the softball team. I'm working my butt off to accomplish this, but I also have to be realistic with myself. I am fully confident in making any softball team, but my biggest concern is getting accepted into school. Michigan is one of the top academic schools in the country, and is very difficult to get accepted into. If by some chance I don't get accepted into UofM I don't want to be left with no back up plan. I have now started to look at other schools as a back up option. Even if I do not attend Michigan, my heart will always bleed maize, and blue.

After spending 10 days in Kentucky volunteering at Ichthus Christian Festival my whole mentality on life has completely changed. I've never been very religious, but Ichthus has opened my eyes. I now proudly admit I am a Christian, and have opened my heart to God. Before I went to Ichthus I wanted to be an Athletic Trainer, but I no longer feel that is that career path I am meant to follow. I have been through a lot in my young life, and I want to help kids who grew up in situations like I did. It's terrible what I was put through, but I don't want to live in pity, I want to use all that negativity for good.

Dawn from my favorite band "Fireflight" told me (regarding my past, and childhood) "You can break free from it, and climb on top of it, onto a platform from which you can share the power of God's healing with others. This makes you a very unique individual with specific powers that not everyone has." And share the power of God's healing is exactly what I intend to do. I know with all the things I have experienced in my life I could use it to make a difference in this world.

As always thanks for reading, and following my journey

God Bless

"What lies behind us, and what lies before us are small matters compared to what lies within us."
 - Ralph Waldo Emerson

*Shoulder Update: It is coming along much better than expected! I was experiencing a lot of pain in the beginning of working out/playing catch, but it's finally feeling a little better. Each week i'm seeing big improvements! My accuracy is slowly coming back, but I still have a long ways to go in gaining back strength in it.

Monday, June 4, 2012

Facing Mt.Everest

As some of you know last Friday (June 1st) I had a meeting at UofM with an advisor about school. It went well, but I was informed if I intend to play softball I will have to change career paths. As previously stated in my last post (My Story) I had already changed career paths to attend UofM so this was quite a setback. Then we talked about scholarships/financial aid etc. Since I will be transferring I will not be eligible for many scholarships as most are for freshman, which was a huge hit as I am financially completely on my own. This mountain climb of a dream has now become Mt.Everest. Due to this, and the academic competition I was advised to look around at "lower-tier" schools. I'm one of the most competitive people you will ever meet, I am fully confident in myself both academically, and as a athlete. I'm not afraid to admit my grades were terrible when I was in Michigan, once I moved to Texas, and was away from all the negativity in my life I made HUGE improvements. I was finally able to focus on school, I was surrounded by people who believed in me, and I got all A's with a few B's. All I need is just someone to give me the opportunity, and a chance.

Besides my meeting at UofM I also have started working out. I am extremely happy with the progress I am making, especially with my shoulder. I know I still have a long ways to go, but I am fully confident, and determined in getting into the best shape for softball. I have also been playing catch, and each time I notice HUGE improvements in my shoulder (accuracy/strength), in a few weeks I will begin full softball training/practicing. More than ever I am confident in my athletic talent. I know i'm 22, and the odds are less than 1% of making my dream come true. But if anyone came beat the odds it's me. The things i've had to overcome in my life have made me ready for this, the fact that I am here typing this I have already overcame greater odds.

Also while in Ann Arbor I walked around the softball complex, and for the first time in my life I felt like that's where I belong. All my life I have been told I would never amount to anything. I have never wanted anything more in my life then to prove all of them WRONG, and make something of myself.

I don't care how much work it takes, I will make it here...

 God bless.
"Sometimes, you have to get knocked down lower than you have ever been to stand back up taller than you ever were."

Tuesday, May 29, 2012

My Story

I was born September 1st, 1989.  I'm the youngest, and only girl of 5. I wasn't one of the lucky kids to grow up with a normal family that had two loving parents. My parents hated each other. As a child I saw, and was put through things I would never wish upon anyone. Thankfully I had my 4 older brothers there to raise me. I wouldn't have turned out the way I have without them, they are more then just my big brothers they are my best friends.

As a kid I was very active, all my brothers played baseball so being athletic was in my blood. I was raised to be an athlete. I loved softball, even as a young child I knew I wanted to play softball in college, it was my ticket to a better life. Growing up I wanted to be a Vet, once I was old enough to figure out I would have to go to Michigan State to be one I decided to change career paths. It has been my dream since I was a little kid to play softball, and get a degree at the University of Michigan. Coaches I played for, and even against would tell me I had the talent to go far. I was a complete player; a rocket arm, could play any defensive position, had good speed, but my greatest strength was my hitting. Not only could I hit for power, but I always had a high batting average while rarely striking out.

I played softball year round up until my sophomore year in high school. I ended up moving to TX before the softball season started, but I came back that summer to play on the Adrian Lookouts travel softball team, I was having the greatest season of my career. We were playing in the Ann Arbor Summer Classic, we had made it to the championship game, the game was tied, with a runner on 2nd. I hit a double to knock the runner in, and slid head first into 2nd base I immediately heard a pop in my right shoulder. I continued to keep playing, it was the championship game, and I refused to go out of the game. We ended up winning, after the game I knew my shoulder was shot. Afterwords I found out not only did I dislocate it, but I also tore it. I gave it time to heal, went back to TX, and tried out for a team down there. I couldn't throw a softball to save my life, after a couple throws I was in excruciating pain. I became depressed, and convinced myself my dream was shot. Growing up I was told the only way I would make it to college was with softball, cause I wasn't smart enough to make it based on intelligence. Having that beat into my head since childhood I believed them. I became depressed, accepted my dream was dead, and I would never attend college.

After living in TX for 6 years I moved back to Michigan this past summer. Since moving back I have felt this void in my life that I could never figure out what it was till I finally I realized it was that I gave up so easily on my dream. I was watching a Oklahoma State football game, and heard the story of Brandon Weeden once I found out how old he was then it hit me, he didn't give up on his dream at his age then neither should I. I have since decided to pursue my dream. I am currently rehabbing my shoulder, and getting in the best shape of my life. I will be going to a community college this fall to get back in the swing of being in school, and work my butt off in the classroom then next fall transfer to UofM. I don't care how much blood, sweat, and tears it takes I WILL accomplish my dream. It's going to take an extreme amount of hard work, but I will do anything to make sure I see this through. I'm a gifted student, and talented athlete. For the first time in my life I believe in myself, and I know I can do it. I don't want to just be a walk-on player, I want to be a core player, the leader that everyone looks to when things get tough. I don't want to just be a student who gets by, I want to be on the Big Ten All-Academics list. I want to be the best, which I know I can be. I guess i'm not just doing this for myself, I'm doing it for every kid who grew up like me, and showing them no matter how rough life can get they can make something of themselves. I want to be someone they can look up to, and be a positive role model in their lives. Most importantly I want, and will represent the block M with pride.

"When a goal matters enough to a person, that person will find a way to accomplish what at first seemed impossible."
- Nido Qubein